Skip to main content

Poem: Thoughts Revealed in Ink and Lead



How beautifully, it seems, my physical world is colliding and intertwining with my spiritual world. 

I quickly wrote down this poem about my morning's activity of transforming my ongoing journal of ten years (!?) into a bullet(ish) journal. I hope these words can encourage you to take a journey you may have been avoiding. Or acknowledge the beauty of a past you might be ashamed of. Or to maybe even just write it all down and let it be without having any judgement for it, good or bad. Because I guarantee you it will be valuable to someone some day.


Thoughts Revealed in Ink and Lead


Flipping through the past, numbering pages
Turn by turn, the pen ink changes
Then to pencil, the lead weight softens
Back to pen again, now in color

Once my thoughts were in black, bold
Then became a bit runny, muddy, black still, though
Scratched out ideas in every other line, corrections, re-directions
(Forget that. It was silly.)

Then they all turned to grey. Cloudy. Uncertain
The words were sure, naively so
(But the truth rests in the smudges of the eraser)
Still, never to be removed. Only faded with every new read.

And the last of these, the truest thing, etched quickly and plainly
Not once erased, not second guessed. 
Just written, accepted, and left to rest unread.
Sure. Of nothing. 
Fed up. And ready to let go.

And now, I am back to ink. But in blue this time.
Blue like water. Flowing.
Knowing, only, that change can, will, must come. 
Knowing, because it has come.
And it was good. 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

10 funny things about being pregnant

One of the most surprising responses I have gotten so far from more than one person since announcing my pregnancy has been something along the lines of "is it difficult being pregnant here/there (meaning in Rwanda)"? My automatic thought is..."uhhh I don't think it's any different than being pregnant anywhere else." Although I have no other frame of reference. So this blog post might be a lot less exciting than you were expecting. BUT I have been watching so many video blogs and reading so many forums that, now, I feel like I want to write about what it has been like for me so far. Just to warn you...it's probably pretty boring stuff.  Numbered lists always make things more fun to read so I'll do it this way: My top 10 things funny things about being pregnant [in Rwanda] so far. And how about this? For each point I will give you a takeaway (which may be useful or may not be relevant to you at all). 1.  Morning sickness was not what I expecte...

When Being Yourself Feels Wrong

In the US, the phrase has become a cliche.  It's synonymous with "The Land of Opportunity".  It was on a poster in at least one of my teachers' classrooms every year of grade school. It's every baby-boomer parent's dream for their child. It's the millennial battlecry.  "Be Yourself"  (or "bee yourself" when the poster had an illustration of a bee on it). I grew up to this mantra playing on repeat in the back of my mind. I continually strove to live up to this no-standard standard. I never tried to be trendy, and, as a matter of fact, I tried to be as un-trendy as possible. I always spoke my mind. I never pretended to be happy if I wasn't. I admitted proudly to others that I didn't like meeting people. To clarify, I didn't just happen to be that way out of nowhere. Much of this attitude came about because I was picked on in elementary school, and I quickly realised that popular, trendy kids were not going to like me. It...